Me: Korben, what is your memory verse this week?
Korben: In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth.
Me: Where is it found in the Bible?
Korben: In the beginning.
Me: True, what book of the bible is it found in?
Korben: Jennifer 1:1
We were originally scheduled to be traveling home from our annual trip to South Carolina on Halloween. I decided we would forfeit Halloween this year… I know, I am a cruel mother. When were asked to stay an additional week in SC I needed to come up with costumes quickly.
When I found out I was pregnant with my first baby I was gushing with joy for those 10 months. I envisioned the kind of parent I would be, strong, in control, calm yet firm. Dobson taught me all I needed to know. I was ready.
And then I delivered the baby, which wasn't so bad, but then came the post partum depression. This hit me hard, real hard. And I struggled, to put it lightly, with nursing. And sleep. Oh for love of sleep. One can never really be prepared on how sleep deprivation totally distorts ones reality. I found that this motherhood thing was not something I enjoyed at all.
Then quickly and unexpectantly God gave me another one of these creatures. And there I was feeling lost in a world filled with diapers, poop, and puke. My world had been completely turned upside-down. Many nights I went to sleep thinking that I hadn't smiled even just once throughout the day. I was mess!
Now 4 1/2 years later, three children, and a house that we have remained in for longer than 6 months I can say with confidence that this motherhood thing is enjoyable, not everyday all day. Is it easy? Hardly. In fact it is the hardest thing I have ever done.
I have recently been taking a lot of time to reflect back on the past four years. I realized this has been an amazing journey full of lots of joy and lots of tears. It's worth the time and energy to look back because this is my life book and I write the chapters. Every chapter in my book, the people, the places, the excitement, the pain; all hold a special place. And I've realized, that all that has happened, needed to happen for me to become the wife, mother, sister, daughter, friend, and child of God that I am today.
About a month ago I taught the kids how to play rock, paper, scissor. And, just like anything else new I show them, they wanted to play for the next 6 hours... especially Korben. I've used, what I like to call the rock, paper, scissors guide to parenting, to end an argument or a battle for the latest greatest toy. The excitement of this great hand game faded.
But then several weeks later Kenzie asked me to play. I say, "Ok let's play". She grabs my hand and guides me over to the table to play. When I get to the table I find this.
that the dentist office could feel like a mini vacation. I knew I needed a little break from the kiddos when I remembered I had a dentist appt. this morning and I was excited about it. When the dentist walked in he asked, "How are you today?" I replied, "I am so relaxed, could I stay for the day?"
This was written on 9/3 when Korben started school. I am just getting around to posting it now.
Korben,
You started preschool today. I didn't weep and cry but I could have and almost did. You will be going 3 days a week from 9-1pm. You see, you are my first and this is all new to me. You and I, we need the break from one another and I think that it is ok to say that. We are a lot alike and that makes our relationship tense at times. When 1pm comes I am excited to hear about your day of play and adventures and you seem curious about mine… I think you are just checking with me to make sure you didn't miss out on anything important. I am so excited for you and scared for you. I'm scared to let you go into this world where there is so much that can negatively infect your spirit. But we can do this. Both of us because we have a God that will never leave us or forsake us.
Praying for you always.
I love you.
-Mama
Kenzie and I were discussing what kind of activities she would be interested in participating in this fall.
I mentioned some choices.
"You could take a dance class, a cooking class, or maybe swimming lessons."
She mentioned that her top choices were cooking and sleeping.
I didn't realize that she found such enjoyment in sleeping that she labeled it as a fun activity.
Let me just mention that Kenzie never sleeps past 7am and most days is up by 6am.
So I discussed with Kenzie the importance of practice.
To master a skill one must practice over and over again.
It would be wise to make a decision to sleep until 8am or 9am and then you will have all the practice you need to become a pro-sleeper.
The only problem is…
Fast forward 10 years….Me: Kenzie, time to wake up for school.
Kenzie: Mom, not now, I am practicing to become a pro.
she will find the paint and create a masterpiece.
Do not leave a stroller without the break on next to an inground pool on a windy day with a sleeping baby in it.
This could have been disastrous if my neighbor hadn't been sitting directly next to the stroller and reacted quickly to the movement.
I L.O.V.E summer.
Here are my Top 5 reasons:
5. Fireflies. There is something so magical about these little creatures. When I see them perform their evening light show, I have one of those moments when I stand in awe of God's glorious creation.
4. Dressing my children in way less clothes than any other season. The less is more saying holds true for me in summer. The less amount of time it takes me to find clothes/dress my children, the more happier this mama is.
3. The beach. Nothing like it. Although it is way more beautiful in the fall and spring when it is so gloriously peaceful with way less people. But we love ocean swimming in the summer.
2. Fresh veggies from Poppy's garden.
And the number 1 reason I love summer...
1. The summer season somehow gives me permission to eat ice cream every single night… with hot fudge… although spring, fall, and winter give me this same permission, even though ice cream is one of my least favorite desserts.
Korben had sports camp this past week. It was great for him and slightly unbearable for me. While he played, I tried to manage a crying infant (sports camp just so happens to coincide with Koah's naptime) and entertain a whiny 3 year old in the middle of a field in 88 degrees and 100% humidity. And while Korben really enjoyed his time, I was excited when the week finally came to an end. The coach, along with several other mothers who brought their cameras (I didn't fall into this category), requested a group picture. I looked on (cameraless) proud of my talented boy when my boy began to pick his nose… and he picked and continued to pick.
So there you have it, while it is not bad enough that my kid picks his nose in public, he has now been photographed partaking in this event. If only sports camp had dedicated a day to this sport he could had been the coach.
We bought our house from a couple with the last name Karr.
We have referred to them on occasion since moving in.
Korben has been recently asking about these Karrs.
I have explained to him who they are and he seems so intrigued by these people he has never met.
And then it hit me… he thinks that cars once lived here. I think he envisions our min van, Mrs. Wagaman's Suburban, Nana & Poppy's Highlander, Aunt Geri's Tourag , and Papa's pick-up truck sitting down conversing about what kind of people they would like their drivers to be, all while eating a well balanced meal of oil, gasoline, and antifreeze. Oh, how he would love to converse with cars and trucks, especially garbage trucks.
Korben began complaining about eating his breakfast.
Korben: I don't like oatmeal anymore Mama.
Me: Really, you liked it two days ago, and the day before that.
Korben: I don't like it today.
Me: Ok, here is your choice. You can eat your oatmeal or you can have spinach and string beans?
Korben: I'll have spinach and string beans.
And per his request here he is with his bowl full of veggies for breakfast. And for the record he ate the entire bowl.
I don't love my house. It's a house. Nothing special, nothing fancy, but it is clear to me why God has placed us hear for now… my neighbor and friend. This post is for you Laurie.
I want to thank you for helping me make rational decisions when I was being completely irrational, especially over the past few weeks. For crying with me and laughing with me. For making me laugh when I was crying. For helping haul my gear onto the beach and then caring for my children while I was nursing Koah. Then holding Koah so I could be with K & MK. Most of all I thank you for loving my children when I couldn't take one more second of the insanity. You have been a blessing to our entire family.
I knew that it was bound to happen but I didn't think it would be this soon. We are going to have to purchase a mini van. We explored some other options but the mini van seems the most practical. I will probably love it once I get it but the thought kind of scares me. It means most other vehicles are too small for my growing family… sometimes I still can't believe that I am a mother to 3 children. These little people depend on me and sometimes I can be the most undependable person. When I had one child I drove a Mercedes… those were the days. When I had two children I drove and still drive a 4 Runner. And now…
- the mini van,
- the room for 8 mini van,
- the what fills the preschool parking lot mini van,
- the I am a mother on a mission that I am late for because my kid pooped through his outfit and is puking up the crayon he just ate mini van,
- the what doesn't need the "Baby on Board" sign because we all know that it is just a given mini van.
- the I am going to love mini van.
Stay tuned for pictures of her, she's a beauty.